Los Alamos FertilityCare

Plan Your Family.....Naturally

2011-09-17T15:49:00.006-06:00

Thursday, October 6, 7 p.m.
San Juan Parish Hall

Would you like to learn a way to create a stronger bond in your marriage? Would you like to have more open communication and better appreciate intimacy? Please come to "Plan Your Family... Naturally," a DVD presentation at San Juan Parish Hall, Ohkay Owingeh, NM on Thursday, October 6, 7-8 p.m. During this presentation participants will develop a general understanding of natural family planning and discover why couples who practice NFP have a divorce rate of less than five percent.
“Plan Your Family…Naturally” is one of the best videos on natural family planning that may be used by engaged couples groups, bible study groups, church and other organizations. Los Alamos FertilityCare is available to offer this video and facilitate discussions about the benefits of natural family planning in Espanola, NM and surrounding nearby communities. To request a presentation for your church or organization, please contact Mamie Farish, lafertilitycare@yahoo.com.

About the DVD:
Title: “Plan Your Family…Naturally”

Director/ Producer: John Romanowsky
Sponsored by: Diocese of Rockville, NY in association with Order of Malta
Running Time: 22 minutes

Synopsis: Shot in a basic documentary interview format, Drs. Jennifer and Matthew DeMarco are joined by Chris and Dan Volpe and Damon and Melanie Owens, married couples who share their own experience of discovering, learning, and living NFP. These couples give a heartfelt, real-life witness to its effectiveness, challenges, and many benefits-practical, relational, and spiritual-as they cooperate with God’s natural plan for married sexuality.

How to Mentor Chastity?

2010-11-08T08:10:00.000-07:00

Do you want to know how to promote chastity and marriage? This was the question that was asked during the training workshop for New Life Pregnancy Center in Taos, New Mexico , Saturday, November 6.

They listened to a talk on How to Mentor Chastity, and learned tips for guiding teens and single adults on how to live a chaste life, as well as practical information on how to find the right person to marry. Mamie Farish, FCP, Los Alamos FertilityCare, explained that many sex ed programs, (including abstinence programs), offer a wealth of information on contraception, STDs, and communication skills. These programs, however, are often weak in explaining why sexual activity belongs in marriage. The "big elephant in the room" topic that isn't discussed is, fertility, she said. "Fertility is power; it is the power we have to become parents. This is what we need to discuss upfront with our teens and single adult family members, friends and acquaintances."

In our world today, few couples link their sexuality activity with baby-making. Farish says she often asks sexually-active teens and adults, "Will the person you are intimate with become the mother/father of your children?" Typically the responses she receives are looks of surprise and fright. It is as if we live in a society where people believe sex has nothing to do with babies.

It's important to bring up the topic of parenting, for example, by asking about what qualities you desire in the person who will one day become the father or mother of your children. This guidance helps our teens and young adults to place sexual activity within the institution of marriage; it's reasonable that the person you want to become the parent of your children is also the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. There is an old adage that a person may be attracted to lots of people of the opposite sex, but there is only one person he or she desires to be the parent of his or her children.

Many thanks to the people who serve on the front lines in helping couples with unplanned pregnancies. (The photo is of the staff at New Life Pregnancy Center in Taos, under the direction of Theo Paddington.)

Theology of the Body Retreat, Based on Sex and the Sacred City

2010-07-28T12:57:00.011-06:00

If you promote marriage and family life, chances are you've searched for books, tapes and conferences to help you teach on Pope John Paul II's Theology of the Body. Author Steve Kellmeyer offers some practical TOB teaching materials. His two books, Sex and the Sacred City and Artfully Teaching the Faith are invaluable resources and inexpensive teaching aids for those who teach--natural family planning teachers, pastors, religious education directors, catechists, RCIA team leaders, youth ministers, or marriage & engaged couple ministers.

Kellmeyer's books make it easy to teach Theology of the Body to students with little background in theology of philosophy. My husband Tom and I recently used his two books when we gave a two-day retreat on Theology of the Body. The group consisted of experienced catechists who appreciated the simplicity in teaching basic TOB concepts. It encouraged them to use the presentation for their students. They left the retreat with confidence and the knowledge that they can teach Theology of the Body to others!

The retreat covered information about who God is, who we are, the Fall, Incarnation, Sacraments, Marriage, Celibacy, Family Life. It's a wonderful way to get the big picture on Catholic teachings based on Theology of the Body. And it's probably the easiest Theology of the Body course to offer. It's also probably the least expensive: simply purchase the two books. Each book is under 100 pages long, easy reading, and includes chapter questions. We've published our TOB slide presentation (based on these two books) on Scribd for teachers to use or to adapt. Happy TOB-ing! Spread the good news!TOB Retreat using Sex and the Sacred City

A Basic NFP Quiz

2010-07-27T07:58:00.002-06:00

Do you run into people who still believe that natural family planning is the rhythm method? It's only for Catholics? It doesn't work?

I designed an easy NFP quiz. No matter who takes the quiz-- teens, college students, single adults, married couples, retired people-- most flunk it. So here's a new education mission: Why not use different layouts with this quiz, but keep the questions the same? Layouts may include various seasonal and holiday motifs, including Halloween, Christmas, Valentine's Day. It's a good idea to place the quiz at various locations: health fairs, bazaars, waiting rooms, etc. My hope is, a year from now many more will successfully pass the quiz! Here's the quiz. See how well you do!

Please Answer, True or False

The birth control pill is ranked as a Group 1 carcinogen (World Health Organization), including higher risks for breast cancer, liver and cervical cancer. A woman who takes birth control pills before her first child is born has at least a 40 percent increased risk of developing breast cancer (Kahlenborn).
Natural family planning (nfp) is good marriage insurance. Couples who practice nfp have less than a three percent divorce rate, according to a study conducted by the Family of Americas Foundation.
The Creighton Model FertilityCare System, a method of natural family planning, is 96.8% effective for avoiding pregnancy.
NaProTechnology, a new women's health science, is nearly three times more successful than in vitro fertilitzation (IVF) for assisting infertile couples to achieve successful pregnancies.

(The answers to all these questions are true. for more information, visit www.losalamosfertilitycare.com.)

Why does the Catholic Church teach that?

2009-09-10T10:19:00.007-06:00

(I've recently produced a slide presentation for engaged couples who are planning to marry in the Catholic Church. It's entitled, "Catholic Church Teachings on Sexuality, " available at Scribd. )

Who said, "Persons who use contraception will never learn the value of self-restraint.. [it] will sap the vitality of both men and women, perhaps more of men than women. It is unmanly to refuse battle with the devil?" Was it a priest? A Pope? Actually, it was neither a priest or Pope. In fact it's someone who wasn't even Catholic.

Still, it's the Catholic Church that's known for teaching that contraceptives are "intrinsically evil" (Catechism of the Catholic Church 2370). Most people, however, don't have the foggiest notion why the Catholic Church prohibits contraception for married couples.

As a Catholic, I remember protesting against this church teaching in my 20s, thinking it must be because the Catholic Church is led by a male hierarchy that's celibate. "What do they know?" I thought. "They don't understand." I left the Catholic Church, partly because of Her teaching regarding contraceptives.

You can well imagine my terrible awakening when I returned to the Catholic Church in my 30s, and read Pope Paul VI's Humanae Vitae, an encyclical on the regulation of birth: "It is also to feared that the man, growing used to the employment of anti-conception practices, may finally lose respect for the woman and no longer caring for her physical and psychological equilibrium, may come to the point of considering her a mere instrument of selfish enjoyment, and no longer as his respected and beloved companion."

When I read his words, I realized that the Catholic Church cares deeply for women and I had been so badly mistaken in my young adult years. Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa! (My friends, especially my non-Catholic friends giggle when I use this well-loved Catholic expression for accepting fault. It's wonderful to admit fault simply, "My own fault, my own fault, my most grievous fault." It's easy, quick, and so cleansing.)

In my middle 30s, I discovered the wisdom of Catholic Church teachings on sexuality. My husband and I converted from contraception to the Creighton Model FertilityCare System, a method of natural family planning. I had hoped to keep this conversion secret from family and friends because it was a very counter-cultural thing to do. It was as if my husband and I were a freak of nature, or so I thought of ourselves back then. Everyone I knew practiced contraception except for my husband and me. But God had other plans. Soon women were asking me how they could learn about natural family planning for them and their husbands. Because there were no teachers where we lived, and with my husband's blessing, I took classes to become a practitioner of the Creighton Model FertilityCare System. That was nearly 10 years ago.

I've recently produced a slide presentation for engaged couples who are planning to marry in the Catholic Church. It's entitled, "Catholic Church Teachings on Sexuality, " available at Scribd. You may place the slide presentation next to the accompanying text document on your computer.

So, who was the person who said that those who practice contraception will never use self-restraint? It's Mohandas Gandhi, the beloved Hindhu leader. The Catholic Church teachings on sexuality isn't just for Catholics. It's for everybody who desire the best for the themselves, their spouses, marriages and families.

You Can Manage Your Reproductive Health Naturally!

2009-07-06T16:50:00.004-06:00

Calling all college-age students and single adults living in Los Alamos, Espanola, and northern New Mexico.

Los Alamos FertilityCare is offering free introductory sessions on the Creighton Model FertilityCare System to college-aged students and single adults this summer. This is a one-hour presentation that gives basic information on how to identify when you are fertile and infertile.

Approximately 20 college-aged and single adults attended the CrMS Introductory Session last summer. According to former participants, the session is packed with information and very worthwhile. The CrMS Introductory Session covered information they were never taught, not even in their basic college biology classes. One participant remarked how she wished she had received this information in high school before college.

"As a college freshman I was unprepared for Valentine's Day," she explained. "While eating lunch in the cafeteria, condoms were dropped at our tables. My friends and I were told to have 'safe sex.' It was insulting. I'm interested in finding the right person to marry, and I want to do the best I can to properly care for my fertility. The CrMS Introductory Session has given me information to help me realize my dreams for marriage and family, and to take care of my health. It is empowering."

This summer Los Alamos FertilityCare plans to reach even more people with its Introductory Session. If you know of single adults, please pass on the information about this free presentation. If you are college-aged and single, why not get a couple of your friends together and call Los Alamos FertilityCare to arrange a time for the one-hour class? In addition to learning new information, the classes are lots of fun. Learning about your fertility is good for you and for your health.

To arrange for a Introductory Session, please call 505 412-2474, or e-mail at lafertilitycare@yahoo.com.

Real Help for Infertile Couples: NaProTECHNOLOGY

2009-04-09T10:17:00.005-06:00

Trying to get pregnant, but can't? Or, you become pregnant, but suffer miscarriages?

One in five couples in the United States experiences infertility, subfertility or recurring miscarriages. Typically these women have had their blood drawn on day 3-to-7 of the menstrual cycle to assess gonadotrophin and prolactin levels, thyroid function, hemoglobin, rubella status and testosterone levels. They have additional blood tests on day 21 or 22 of the cycle to measure progesterone levels. The men have undergone seminal fluid analyses, post-coital tests, ultrasound examinations. Then the couples are usually given a trial of clomid for six-to-nine months. If clomid doesn't work, the couples are advised to undergo Artificial Reproductive Technology (ART). Occasionally, ovulation induction with follicular stimulating hormone (FSH) may be given for three-to-six cycles. Ultimately, however, most of these couples are ushered into the fertility doctor's office to begin the in vitro fertilization process, a costly and invasive procedure with a success rate less than 30 percent.

In their pursuit to get real answers, these couples are tremendously frustrated, discouraged, and for good reason. In fact, it can be legitimately said that obstetricians and gynecologists did a far better job caring for infertile couples in the 1950s than they do in the 21st century. In 1950 the pregnancy rate following ovarian wedge resection was 66 percent. Compare that success to today's 23 percent success rate with IVF treatments. In a real sense, the successful treatment of infertility is sliding backwards instead of advancing.

But there's hope for this couples. NaProTechnology is a new women's health science founded by Dr. Thomas W. Hilgers, director of the Pope Paul VI Institute for the Study of Human Reproduction and the National Center for Women's Health in Omaha, Nebraska. NaProTechnology success rates are 1.5 to 3 times higher than IVF (23.5% vs. 38.4%-81.8%).

Unlike artificial reproductive technologies which ignores the underlying causes of infertility, the focus of NaProtechnology is diagnosis and treatment, while maintaining the natural act of intercourse. Couples are asked to chart their cycles using the Creighton Model FertilityCare System (CrMS). After charting two cycles, the evaluation begins. The charts provide valuable clinical information such as identifying the timing of ovulation and determining the length of the follicular and luteal phases in a woman's cycle.

Dr. Phil C. Boyle, NFPMC Galway, relates how he uses the chart: "Couples have come to me and said, 'My day 21 progesterone is about 30. It's normal. I don't have low progesterone.' So our first evaluation will be day P+7 progesterone [based on the woman's chart]. I tell them that they are correct! The day 21 progesterone level is fine at 30 but their P + 7 progesterone level is entirely too low. That frequently launches us into a complete hormone study. We discuss the increased incidence of miscarriage and preterm labor associated with low hormone levels and the need to supplement or repair. "

The NaProTechnology approach includes three phases:

Establish a diagnosis. After a woman charts two cycles, a medical consult is submitted to a physician who is trained in NaProTechnology. Typically the diagnosis will include routine FSH, LH, prolactin, rubella, B12, thyroid function as well as estradiol and progesterone and testosterone as indicated. "These results are a very satisfying thing for somebody who is experiencing difficulty, as they are finally able to get some answers and explanations," says Dr. Boyle.
Targeted treatment. Generally, targeting the treatment may last about three cycles. The CrMS chart is used to determine if the treatment is successful or if further research is needed to fix the problem. If surgery is indicated, surgical NaProTechnology is offered, which is a specialized form of gynecologic surgery to reconstruct the uterus, fallopian tubes and ovaries in such a way that pelvic adhesive disease can be eliminated. "It is, in a sense, a 'near-adhesion free' form of surgery," says Dr. Hilgers.
Begin Counting Good Cycles. "Everyone wants to get pregnant yesterday," says Dr. Boyle. With NaProTechnology it takes about three months to evaluate the problem and three months to fix it. After that, the goal is to get 12 effective cycles, but to get 12 effective cycles could take 18 months. Dr. Boyle stresses it is important that couples keep it enjoyable. "If you're putting life on hold waiting to get pregnant, it's probably not going to happen. Minimize stress from work, illness, bereavement, holidays, and every place possible. Then relax and enjoy a loving environment."

Presently there are 220 physicians trained in NaProTechnology in the United States and Canada, with 52 more trained physicians practicing in other countries. To find a Creighton Model FertilityCare practitioner and NaProTechnology medical consultant closest to you, visit FertilityCare Centers of America.

The Green Guide to Family Planning

2009-03-30T12:29:00.013-06:00

Natural family planning is a green idea. It's good for our bodies and souls, women and men, children conceived, the health and well being of families and our planet earth.
Here's how:

1) Natural family planning doesn't pollute rivers, lakes and streams. Scientists have discovered a recent and disturbing phenomena, "intersex" fish found downstream from sewer plants. These abnormal fish contain both male and female features. Endangering these fish are the synthetic estrogen and other steroid hormones from birth control pills and patches that are excreted in urine into sewage systems.

2) Natural family planning doesn't hurt animals. Scientists are finding the presence of female hormones making the male species less male. This includes studies on frogs, river otters and fish. In some places off the coastal waters of southern California, up to 90 percent of the male hornyhead turbot, a common flatfish, have produced egg yolk proteins. These male fish had estrogen levels as high as females and low thyroid hormone that could impair the development of fish embryos.

3. Natural family planning doesn't hurt a man's fertility. According to L'Osservatore Roman, the Vatican newspaper, the birth-control pill is causing "devastating" environmental damage and plays a role in rising male infertility rates. Birth control pill inventor Carl Djerassi says that the “pill” has led to a "demographic catastrophe. It is having a devastating ecological effects of the tons of hormones discarded into the environment each year. We have sufficient data to state that one of the causes of masculine infertility in the West is the environmental contamination caused by the products of the 'pill’”.

4) Natural family planning is healthy for women. The International Agency for Research on Cancer reported that the pill has carcinogenic effects, including higher risks for breast cancer, liver and cervical cancer. The risk of breast cancer is over 40 percent if it is used before a woman's first child is born. Other side effects include high blood pressure, blood clots, stroke, and heart disease.

5) Natural family planning doesn't trick a woman's sense of smell. Studies show that women on the birth control pill pick bad mates because their sense of smell is off. Major histocompatibility complex (MHC) genes are involved in immune response and other functions. The best mates are those that have different MHC smells. Unfortunately, studies show that women on the pill prefer guys with matching MHC odors. Couples with matching-MHC show less satisfaction, higher levels of infertility problems, and breakdown in relationships when women stop using the birth control pill.

6) Couples who practice natural family planning have healthy libidos. Birth control has been observed to decrease a woman's a libido. After 30 years researchers are acknowledging that the pill can cause weight gain, depression, decrease libido and decrease sexual enjoyment. The birth control pill inhibits the production of androgens, including testosterone, in a woman's ovaries. Androgens have a direct effect on a woman's libido.

7) Couples who practice natural family planning have fewer divorces--less than five percent-- than couples who contracept. Healthy and happy family families create less waste and less energy consumption than couples who divorce and split up the family assets and properties.

8) Natural family planning cost less than birth control pills. Some forms of hormonal contraception costs up to $60 per month. That's money that could be put aside for a mini-vacation or other family uses. Natural family planning methods are as reliable, and even better than, birth control pills to prevent pregnancy. Also, natural family planning helps a couple to identify fertile times when pregnancy is more likely to occur, for those times when a couple desires to welcome children in their family.

9) Natural family planning empowers women to take charge of their health. Women who use natural family planning oftentimes receive early intervention and treatment for gynecologic and obstetric health because they are more attuned to their bodies. By charting the menstrual cycles, women can identify potential risk of miscarriage and infertility and have these problems treated. NaProTECHNOLOGY, a new women's health science, uses information gathered from women's charts. It is nearly three times more successful in assisting infertile couples than in vitro fertilization, 95 percent successful for treating premenstrual syndrome and postpartum depression, and is much less expensive than the artificial reproductive technologies.

10) Natural family planning respects the environment within the family setting. It respects the dignity of the woman, man, marriage and the children they conceive. Birth control pills, however, treat fertility and the conception of children as a disease. With the birth control pill, breakthrough ovulation may occur, and pregnancy may result. One of the actions of the pill is to make the uterine lining a hostile environment, thus acting as an abortifacient because it expels a small human embryo. Sadly, the marital embrace may thus become a "killing field" for a couple’s newly conceived children.

More people are going green with natural family planning. In France the use of the pill among women ages 15 to 24 years old dropped from 43 percent in 2003 to 26 percent in 2007. "The principal reason for this decrease is the attention paid by women to their health," says Genetique, a French bioethics organization. "It is now proven that the pill suppresses libido and causes weight gain. The fear of cancer and sterility are equally responsible."

Live green. Love green. That’s natural family planning. It is good for all God's children and creatures.

Defend Marriage, Uncle Sam Needs You

2009-03-26T08:12:00.017-06:00

Uncle Sam wants you, to keep America free and strong. To all defenders of marriage, and all that is good and noble, to all who believe in the dignity of the unborn child and the sanctity of marriage, it's time to go on the offense.

The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and UnPlanned Pregnancy has launched two videos on the topic of unplanned pregnancy. Their message is, "Make better choices. Use birth control every time." Their audience are young single adults, and probably, high school teens. These videos are hip, slick, and persuasive. Unless our teens and young adults are prepared, they are going to be bamboozled and razzled dazzled, like Edward was bribed with sweets in The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis.

The best way to defend our country is to defend all that we hold dear, our families. Let's take on this fight, knowing that we are right. The evidence of the past 50 years clearly shows that the Campaign is advocating lifestyle behaviors that hurt people.

When talking about relationships to others, especially teens and single adults, keep married love and the gift of life together. The truth is, contraceptives fail to separate life-giving (procreation) from love. It doesn't matter if the failure rate is 10 percent, less or more. The fact that contraceptives fail is a sufficient enough reason to support abstinence before marriage. The Campaign's videos avoid discussion of married love and the gift of life.

Always bring up parenting in discussions that involve dating and courtship: "Would the person you are dating make a good mother/father to your children?" or "Who do you think would make a good mother or father?" or "If you are sexually active, there is no 100% guarantee that you will not become a mother or a father. Have you thought what would you do if you became pregnant?"

It is important to remind everyone that children are gifts, the supreme gift of parents. The Campaign's videos portray babies as a disease, toxic and threatening our lives. Actually, it's the other way around. Our unborn babies' lives are at risk because of the way we want to live without consequences for our actions. So get out the ultrasound pictures to show of your new baby, grand baby, or pictures from your pregnant friends. Be attentive to every baby, and offer encouraging words to young mothers and fathers. It's always a good day when a baby coos, smiles, or laughs. It's also good to hear a hearty cry from an infant, too. They remind us that life is full of blessings and wonders.

Show our young people the Renaissance world of the human person. The Campaign's videos depict a sad caricature of the human person, hooked-and-snagged to a medieval understanding of sexuality. It's a life that's narrow, lop-sided, and crooked. The Renaissance world of the human person, however, involves our whole being. It's called SPICE, which stands for spiritual, physical, intellectual, communicate/creative, emotional. We are all called to grow into these areas of our life, in order to become more fully the person we are created to be.

How does SPICE works? It's a good idea to think about successful relationships. For example, I knew a young woman who heard her father playing the violin after supper every night. It was a time when she and her sisters would sing and wash dishes. This beautiful, charming woman dated several men. She enjoyed all their company. But the man she married was a man who played the guitar. They sang songs in the evening and continued this tradition with their little ones and for the rest of their lives. She is my mother. Recently I met a young man who was in a difficult relationship. When I went over SPICE with him, we spent a lot of time discussing the creative/communication aspects in SPICE. He explained that his girlfriend wasn't interested in his guitar playing which was important to him. Later he broke up with her. I said, "When you find that special someone who will one day be your bride, may she be the one to tell your children, 'Come, let's hear daddy play guitar.'" I linked future parenting with the the person who my young friend hopes to marry one day.

We want our teens and young single adults to live life fully, in the "welcoming spirit of wonder and the glow of the unexpected good," as G. K Chesterton once said. So we have our offense: 1) tie babies to bonding, life & love, 2) celebrate the gift of children, and 3) teach our young people how to put SPICE in their lives. For more information about chastity, and tips for courtship and dating, please visit my website, www.losalamosfertilitycare.com.

History on Reproductive Idols

2009-03-24T17:04:00.007-06:00

KLDoebling asked:

When you say, "It used to be that our society would not tolerate such high birth rates outside of marriage, recognizing it as a detriment for the well being and health for society to prosper..." When was that? What are some examples? I would love to explore that aspect of your article. What does it take to move society into and out of licentiousness. How can we change this mindset?

These are excellent questions, and for answers we need to check with my favorite historian, Will Durant who wrote an 11-volume world history series published in 1944, The Story of Civilization. The society that closely resembles our modern society in wrecking marriage--and therefore, our culture and society-- is Rome 1 A.D.

In Caesar and Christ, Volume III, Durant explains that some historians attribute the fall of Rome to the separation of sex from parentage. Extravagance and adultery were widespread. Among the upper classes, marriage was increasingly infrequent and, many couples that did marry failed to produce offspring. Once the rearing of children had been an obligation of honor and enforced by public opinion, but from about the 1st A.D, Roman society thought it was absurd to demand more births in crowded cities. Seneca consoled a mother who had lost her only child by reminding her how popular she would now be; for “with us childlessness gives more power than it takes away.”

Some women took eunuchs as contraceptive husbands, others entered into sham wedlock with poor men with the understanding that the wife need bear no children and might have as many lovers as she pleased. Contraception was practiced in both its mechanical and chemical forms. If these methods failed there were many ways of procuring abortions. Though branded as a crime, infanticide flourished. Sexual excesses may have reduced human fertility; the voidance or deferment of marriage had a like effect. Plantianus, Praetorian Prefect, had 100 boys emasculated, and then gave them to his daughter as a wedding gift. Rome was conquered not by barbarian invasion from without, but by barbarian multiplication within.

Our society today has a shallow understanding of sexuality, with its promotion of "condoms here, condoms there, condoms everywhere" mentality, and its message of "safe sex." Sex is by its nature unsafe. Authors Amy and Leon Kass in Wing to Wing, Oar to Oar explain that "All interpersonal relations are necessarily risky and serious ones especially so. And to give oneself to another, body and soul, is hardly playing it safe."

The good news about the increase in birth rates is that couples/women are having babies and procuring less abortions. But 40 percent of children born-out-of-wedlock causes its own set of problems.

Ogden Nash had it right, says Amy and Leon Kass: "'Hogamus higamus, men are polygamous; higamus hogamus, women monogamous.' To make naturally polygamous men accept the conventional institution of monogamous marriage has been the work of centuries of Western civilization, with social sanctions, backed by religious teachings and authority, as major instruments of the transformation, and with female modesty as a crucial civilizing device. As these mores and sanctions disappear, courtship gives way to seduction and possession, and men become again the sexually, familially, and civically irresponsible creatures they are naturally always in danger of being."

So, how can we change this mindset. We go back to the solution offered by Pope Benedict VXI this past week in Africa. The solution "...can only come through a twofold commitment: firstly, the humanisation of sexuality, in other words a spiritual and human renewal bringing a new way of behaving towards one another; and secondly, true friendship, above all with the suffering, a readiness - even through personal sacrifice - to stand by those who suffer".

How we apply Pope Benedict VXI advice will probably involve the acceptance of natural family planning, ensuring that the love-making and life-making purposes of marriage are not separated. So a simple idea is to promote natural sex. Ethicist Janet Smith says that today people have so little experience with what is called 'natural' sex, that it seems like we're talking with a foreign language:

"Our culture has succeeded in getting across the message that sex has nothing to do with love. You're dealing with people who have no awareness of what you're talking about. You [supporters of marriage and natural family planning] have something to offer that is of such profound importance that it is really hard to comprehend it. While our sexuality is only part of our being, if we get our sexuality wrong, there is really almost nothing else that we will do very well. Yet if we get our sexuality right, almost everything else goes a whole lot better."

Smashing the "Reproductive Rights" Idol

2009-03-19T08:08:00.007-06:00

For too long we have treated "reproductive rights" as a sacred cow, without questioning how these rights impact the lives of children, women, marriages and families. The social trends of 40 years indicate alarming increases in children involved in divorce, teenage suicide, divorce, violent crime rates, teenage pregnancy rates, births to unmarried women, and the list of downward societal trends continues. In fact, a study today shows that birth rates are up, with 40 percent of children born out-of-wedlock. It used to be that our society would not tolerate such high birth rates outside of marriage, recognizing it as a detriment for the well being and health for society to prosper. We refuse to give up "reproductive rights." May nothing stand in her way. But unfettered "reproductive rights" is just a sacred cow, and we're tolerating a ridiculous situation at our own peril.

Yesterday Pope Benedict XVI, a realist, tried to bring some common sense into this discussion. He is being ridiculed for asserting that condoms are not the solution to the HIV problem. He responded by saying that the HIV/AIDS cannot be overcome with mere slogans or resolved by distributing condoms; quite the contrary we risk worsening the problem. The solution "...can only come through a twofold commitment: firstly, the humanisation of sexuality, in other words a spiritual and human renewal bringing a new way of behaving towards one another; and secondly, true friendship, above all with the suffering, a readiness - even through personal sacrifice - to stand by those who suffer".

Our society faces many problems that involve choices in our sexual matters--crisis pregnancies, women who are unable to marry and are aware that their biological time clock is running out, couples who desire sexual intimacy without marriage, couples with infertility issues, etc. If we're going to resolve these problems, we need to first bring a new way of looking at the problem, "a spiritual and human renewal" of behaving towards one another. Human beings are not cardboard characters that can cut themselves away from an abortion, or detach themselves from the decision in IVF to selectively reduce multiple embryos. A man and a woman in an intimate sexual relationship are not meant to separate when the feelings for each other go away, without the promises of marriage. A mother is not meant to be an enemy of her unborn child, a man or woman are not meant to give their procreative powers to a third party, like an IVF doctor, and then to have their children treated as "products."

We need to see what unfettered "reproductive rights" truly are, idols that bring an enormous amount of problems and misery. Of course there are personal sacrifices, as Pope Benedict XVI explains. We may be asked to put aside our immediate wants and desires for the sake of others. But with that, we become more fully human, capable of true friendships.

It's time to smash the "reproductive rights" idols. For our sake, for our children, and for the good of society, a new sexual revolution is needed.

Children looking for the sperm donor father

2009-03-11T16:07:00.005-06:00

Last week, I wrote about how children yearn for a father, in "Are You My Father?" Surprisingly--although I shouldn't have been surprised---there are grown children who are now searching for the sperm donors who are their genetic fathers, "Donor Babies Search for Their Anonymous Fathers." Reading about their plight is something out of science fiction. Wendy Kramer, the mother of a donor-conceived son, created the Donor Sibling Registry in 2000. Her son Ryan discovered he has nine siblings. This registry has helped to connect more than 6300 half siblings. Currently the number of registrants is 23,552. But their numbers will skyrocket in the years to come. A Donor Sibling Registry sounds like stuff you read about in science fiction; but it's real, the real life stories of real people searching for their identity.

Kathleen Ruby, conceived by an anonymous donor, says, "I look in the mirror, and I don't know who's face is reflected back." Her feelings are common among donor-conceived children. She says that she doesn't blame her mom or the sperm donor because no one had any idea that kids might feel this need to track down the donor. "The parents are pursuing this, and by going through anonymous donation, they get their dream of parenthood," says Kathleen. "But then that loss is just transferred to us. And it's so preventable — it doesn't need to happen."

The other person in this unfortunate real life "science-fiction" story, is the sperm donor. He has all the makings of a real father, even though he's been missing for years in the lives of his sperm donor children. The sperm donors act like... fathers. Twenty years after her birth, Kathleen contacted 250 men who could be her genetic father, and most answered with a fatherly response: "Sorry to say that I am not the lucky person who is your genetic dad..." "Judging from your pictures, your father would, I'm sure, be proud..."

Kathleen is trying to ban anonymous sperm donation. She says this industry cheats children, it purposely creates damaged products, a special breed of human with a built-in loss. This is no donation, she says, and it isn't benign, like giving blood.

Kathleen is no "damaged product." She is an awesome and courageous young woman. There is a reason why a child has a right to a mother and a father who love each other for life, which is called marriage. If we truly love, we will respect a child's rights to a father and mother. If we want the best for our children, we will live chastely, placing the powerful act of sexual intercourse within marriage between a man and a woman who commit to a love that is for life. That's the best place for our children. Everything else is a cheat, something much less than what our children truly deserve.

Update on Making 14 Babies

2009-03-11T15:37:00.006-06:00

As an update to "Making 14 Babies..." there is a new article, "Beyond Octomom," that questions the lack of regulations of IVF physicians. "These IVF physicians need to have the living daylights regulated out of them," says Dr. Sarah Brier, associate director of the University of Missouri School of Medicine's Center for Health Ethics. "We've let technology get beyond the regulations to control it.... Implanting such a large number of embryos goes against a doctor's duty to 'do no harm.'"

Dr. Brier explains that women probably are not informed about the consequences of implanting multiple embryos. Women may not fully understand that "selective reduction" is another way of saying abortion. "Most wouldn’t want to look at an ultrasound and say, 'Kill this one and this one and this one.’”

NaproTechnology is the better way---and saner way-- to help women and couples with infertility issues. For the health of women, let's start getting the word out.

Are You My Father?

2009-02-28T11:39:00.011-07:00

One of my favorite children books is "Are You My Mother?" by P.D. Eastman. I remember reading this for the first time to my young son J.P. Before reading it to him, I read through the story, thinking it was a cute story. But when I started reading aloud, I was alarmed by my son's reaction. He was sincerely concerned for the baby bird, and was drawn into the story, wondering if the baby bird would find its mother. This was a scary book. My mother's reaction was to shut the book and to find some way to distract J.P., who would have none of it. He wanted to know. So I drew my son closer and continued reading. It was a blessed relief to get to the end when the "snort" (the truck) placed the baby bird back into its nest. Mommy and and her baby were united. That's a moment I remember 21 years later, how dear my son was, and how I felt there was nothing that could separate us. A child needs his mom. Mothers are not replaceable. They're very much needed.

If this is true, it seems to me that children feel that way about their fathers. Fathers are important, too. That's why I'm concerned when single women like Nadya Suliman undergo in vitro fertilization to become a mother without the love of a husband, the father to their children. These women demand their reproductive rights to become moms. Will their children ask, "Are You My Father?" to the men who may have been their moms' sperm donors? I think they will ask this quesion because it's a basic question to ask. It's our search for the meaning of life, the ultimate questions concerning who we are, who created us, and for what purpose.

I believe that if a father read a book, "Are you my Father?" to their little ones, he would wrap his big arms around his sons and daughters at night, and promise them that daddy will always be there. Whether we're young, middle aged or entering the twilight of our years, there will always be within our hearts a place for father and mother. Ten, 20, 40 years later, the grown up child will contemplate life's joys and sorrows, wondering "What would daddy think? What would he do? I wish he were here to share this with me."

Fathers were never meant to be replaceable or made irrelevant. Adults may gloss over these matters, thinking it's merely an antiquated, silly idea, but a child never will. If adults were honest with themselves, they would understand too, that it is a great deprivation to be without a father. A child has a right to a mother and a father who love each other for life, exclusively. Anything else will be found lacking and a grave injustice to the child.

The making of 14 babies: Nadya Suleman and Doctor Kamrava

2009-02-23T14:43:00.027-07:00

It took one woman to give birth to 14 babies to finally draw America's attention to the unethical and unregulated practices of fertility clinics. According to reports, Dr. Kamrava implanted six embryos into Nadya Suleman for each of her six pregnancies. During her first four pregnancies, Nadya gave birth to a single baby, twins in her fifth pregnancy, and in her last pregnancy, the six implanted embryos multiplied, resulting in eight live births. Neither Dr. Kamrava nor Nadya expected the multiple births. Nadya is one of the few patients under the care of Dr. Kamrava to achieve a successful pregnancy. The CDC Fertility Clinic Report shows Dr. Kamrava with a 10 percent success rate, compared to national statistics of 38.7 percent of achieving a live birth with InVitro Fertilization (IVF).

Put aside the question of poor judgment by Nadya or Dr. Kamrava. One fact jumps out from the many articles and news stories about "Octo-Mom": the unconscionable high failure rates of infertility clinics. With the "help" of IVF, Nadya lost 28 embryos. Given her prior history of miscarriages before IVF, Nadya is a mother of more than 30 unborn children who didn't live, and a mother of 14 children who were born. This is staggering, beyond the ability for mothers--and fathers-- to comprehend or deal with emotionally, physically or intellectually.

A woman who experiences a miscarriage often suffers grief over the loss of her child. Multiple miscarriages causes almost unbearable sorrow for mothers and couples. What then, does IVF do to mothers and fathers? It imposes unnatural burdens upon them and their precious children conceived. Imagine the woman or the couple permitting a doctor to create their children in a petrie dish, knowing that many of their children will not be born alive. This is not a loving act of a mother or a father. The only possible way for a mother or father to consent to such an act is for them to dehumanize their conceived children. IVF clinics offer these couples a consolation, however, by suggesting that their "spare" embryos may achieve "immortality" as breeding lines for embryonic stem cell research. Nadya did not find that comforting. She refused selective abortion, discarding her embryos, or having them experimented upon before being destroyed.

In the United Kingdom, more than 2.1 million spare embryos were created between 1991 to 2005, for the success of 109,469 live births. In the United States it is necessary to create 16.9 living embryos for one live birth.

Had Nadya met Dr. Thomas W. Hilgers six years ago instead of IVF Dr. Kamrava, it is very likely she would not be dealing with the problem of raising 14 children today. Dr. Hilgers is the founder of a new women's health science, NaProTechnology. NaProTechnology is (38.4%-81.8%) successful in helping couples to achieve a pregnancy. It focuses on the underlying conditions that cause infertility, unlike IVF that doesn't care what the underlying problems are. In fact, Nadya's very public dilemma is causing some nervousness among IVF doctors. They worry couples may choose less invasive methods that restores natural fertility .

NaProTechnology relies on a natural act of intercourse to achieve a pregnancy. It is less expensive, has a lower incidence of multiple births and lower prematurity rates. If Dr. Hilgers had helped Nadya, she and her husband may never have divorced. Higher divorce rates are associated with couples who undergo IVF procedures. With NaProTechnology, Nadya's infertility/miscarriages would have been properly evaluated. She and her husband probably would have had pregnancies, naturally. One baby at a time.

Love and Marriage

2009-01-31T17:45:00.014-07:00

In 1955 Frank Sinatra released his top hit, “Love and Marriage.” Back then, we took it for granted that love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage: “I tell you brother, you can’t have one without the other. Love and marriage goes together like a horse and carriage. It’s an institute you can’t disparage.”

Try singing these lyrics today and you will probably get some funny looks. But back in the 1950s Frank sang, “Love and marriage, try, try, try to separate them. It’s an illusion-- you will only come to this conclusion, love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage.” Heartthrob Frank explained the reason why love and marriage go together is because “Dad was told by mother, you can’t have one without the other.” Without even knowing it, ’Ole Blues Eyes crooned a song that expressed a time-honored tradition on sexuality, marriage, and family that had remained unchallenged for millennia.

So what happened to our world 50 years later? Since the early 1960s our country has experienced exponential increases in divorce and abortion, a six-to-seven-fold increase in the number of unmarried women who have given birth, as well as a rise in child abuse and neglect, drug use, crime rates, suicide and depression, and teenage sexuality. There has been an increase in the number of women who have experienced both childlessness and infertility, a significant increase in widespread availability of pornography and sexual explicitness in film, television, and literature. For the past 50 years we have witnessed a seismic shift in society’s attitudes about love, marriage and family, and with it, left a trail of victims. Why is marriage being so disparaged?

The answer is simple, but it’s a hard truth, because many couples depend upon it and do not want to change. It has been heaped with praises as the number one solution to all our present societal problems; it claims to give us freedom to exercise our sexuality whenever we want it, and with whomever we want, just as long as it is between consenting adults.

The greatest difference between our lives prior to the 1960’s and afterwards is the introduction of the birth control pill. We’re bombarded with messages that by practicing contraception, we are acting responsibly. In the same way that the Surgeon General warns us that smoking is bad for our health and can give us cancer, we’re told that “unprotected” sex is bad for our health and can give us children. Even Madame Speaker Nancy Pelosi unapologetically explains that birth-control funding should be part of the $825 billion stimulus package: "Family Planning services reduce cost," she says.

What we need is a healthy dose of reality. It is preposterous and ludicrous for leaders like Pelosi to morally defend the spending of hundreds of millions of dollars on family planning, when the past 50 years has shown the abysmal failure of birth-control for strengthening marriages and families. The advances of birth control have made the health of our society worse.

The reality is, no amount of money on comprehensive sex education or mass distribution of condoms and contraceptives will fix the problems with our families. It won't work because contraception abuses the nature of marriage. In 1968 Paul Paul VI in Humanae Vitae condemned contraception because it violates the dignity of the human person. He explained that the four characteristics of conjugal love include a love that is fully human, total, faithful and exclusive until death, and open to life. Children are really the supreme gift of marriage and contribute very substantially to the welfare of the parents (HV, par. 9).

The societal statistics bear out that for the past 50 years we’re a society that has been “horsing around” with sex. We don’t want to be hitched to carriages that can carry in it, children. If we do have carriages, we want the option to unhitch these “carriages,” when things don’t work out, become troublesome and burdensome. The wisdom of moms and dads of previous generations is considered outdated and irrelevant. The Catholic Church is ridiculed for its teachings on marriage and family. Instead, we take our cues on how to live responsibly sexually from the pulpits of our schools’ sex education programs, Planned Parenthood, and Hollywood.

If we want healthy marriages and families, it's time for us to critically evaluate our most recent past and acknowledge it for what it is, a disaster. And then, it's important for all of us to educate ourselves on the benefits of natural family planning methods that are morally ethical and reliable, like the Creighton Model FertilityCare System. We can stop this nonsense of failed birth control programs and work to build a better world, one family at a time.

Learn What Comprehensive Sex Ed Classes Don't Teach

2009-01-23T10:29:00.018-07:00

I give talks to high school and college-age single women, and it is unbelievable to learn how many really do not know how their bodies work, in spite of "comprehensive sex education classes."

They've attended the college-orientation programs on "safe-sex," for example, or have had condoms thrown at their tables during Valentine's Day parties and told to "Be safe."

This is our tax dollars at work, funding unsound programs that neither properly teach, uplift the spirit, or care for the person. So, we have to get the word out ourselves. Sense & Sexuality is an excellent book that you may download or purchase at Clare Boothe Luce Policy Institute. Please pass on this information--along with the following information not found in comprehensive sex ed programs-- to a young single lady whom you love and care about.

Here's some facts that most women--and men-- do not know

Fertility involves many factors, but the egg, sperm and cervical mucus are all vital for a couple to achieve a pregnancy. If any one of these three factors is missing, the couple will not become pregnant.
Every woman will at one time or another experience an early ovulation. Menstruation is not contraceptive.
A contact pregnancy is possible, without sexual penetration, if the cervical mucus becomes in contact with the seminal fluid.
The cervix is an internal organ, and is often overlooked as important to a woman's health. The cervix, however, is as complicated and finely-tuned as the human eye. Consider all we do to protect our eyes: We wear glasses and sunglasses. We blink to keep the eyes moist. Our daily life is impeded if our eyes become irritated or our sight becomes damaged. Similarly, a woman's cervix is an amazing human organ, vital for a woman's fertility. Sexually transmitted diseases aren't the only problems that can cause damage to the cervix; contraceptives may age and permanently damage the cervical crypts, thus leading to infertility issues in later life, as well as other ob/gynecological issues, including cancer.
Doctors use contraceptives to treat about 18 diagnoses; however, contraceptives do not treat the underlying conditions. For example, it is bad medicine to give anti-depressants to women with premenstrual syndrome or post-partum depression. It isn't depression, it's a hormone problem that needs to be properly evaluated and treated. Women need to insist on proper health care.
When a woman does become pregnant, and she is required to have a C-section, she should make sure that her doctor does a double stitch to close the uterine wall. Currently, to save costs and time in the operating room, some doctors are using only a single stitch that could later lead to uterine rupture, and quite often, adhesions may form that may make future pregnacies more difficult and increase the risk of miscarriage.

Major Study on Teen Pregnancy Raises More Questions

2009-01-19T11:26:00.017-07:00

Given the recent negative reports about sexual abstinence programs and virginity pledges, it's surprising to learn that our country has dramatically reduced teen pregnancy rates by 35 percent between 1991-2005, according to a recently published report by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy. This is very good news, something to cheer about.

But there's no cheering by Planned Parenthood and other comprehensive sex education proponents. Instead of properly evaluating this 5-year study, these sex-experts have jumped to new data, the preliminary data of 2005-2006 that show a 3% increase in teen births after a 14-year steady decline. Listening to them, you would think we are in a worse situation than ever before. Cecile Richards, president of the Planned Parenthood Federation of America says that federal abstinence programs are "an utter failure that has wasted more than $1.5 billion" of the past decade.

Even the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy is disregarding its own study. Incredibly, Sarah Brown, director, says the campaign's approach is "science-driven"in choosing comprehensive sex education programs over abstinence programs. Yet, its study shows that contraceptives were used in more than 45% of unplanned pregnancies.

So, where's the proof in what Richards and Brown claim? Why do Richards and Brown fail to recognize a key factor implemented during the time of teen pregnancy reduction, the wider availability of abstinence programs? Could abstinence programs have been a major contributing factor in the success of teen pregnancy reduction? If so, we need to continue to improve and advance these strategies so that in the next five years we can further lower the teen pregnancy rate.

New Mexico followed national trends in the decline of the teen pregnancy rate for teens ages 15-19 from 1991-2004, according to a new study by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy. New Mexico teen pregnancy rates dropped 24 percent during that period. Still, New Mexico has one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in the United States, with 64 births per 1000 teen girls in 2005. (Overall, the U.S. birth rate for teens ages 15-19 declined 35 percent to 40.4 births per 1000 teen girls in 2005.)

Mamie Farish, fertilitycare practitioner, teaches the Creighton Model FertilityCare System, a method of natural family planning, in Los Alamos, NM.

Back to the Dark Ages: Women's Health Declines

2009-01-15T14:16:00.022-07:00

When it comes to women's health, it's embarrassing to say that our highly advanced medical technology is, in effect, a throwback to the Dark Ages.

During this year's holidays I listened to a lovely 50 year old woman explain that she could never have children because of endometriosis and immune problems. A few months before I talked with a woman who had had seven miscarriages. She had been told by her doctor to stop getting pregnant. Both women had been resigned to their fate, because our medical system told them so.

Their stories are painful. I wonder if they could have been effectively helped with NaProTECHNOLOGY. NaProTECHNOLOGY is a new woman's science that properly evaluates and treats women's gynecological problems.

Presently our medical technology is based on an outdated understanding of a "normal" woman's cycle: 28 days with ovulation occurring on day 14. In reality, these designated "normal" parameters occur in 10-13 percent of women in any given cycle, so it's a misnomer to called it a "normal" cycle.

Also, consider the fact that 50 years ago we were better able to help women with polycystic ovaries to achieve a pregnancy than we do now. In 1950 the pregnancy rate from wedge reduction was 66 percent. In 2001,the pregnancy rate per cycles started with IVF was 23.1 (Hilgers, Medical & Surgical Practice of Technology, p. 487.)

NaProTECHNOLOGY specifically targets evaluation and treatment based on identifiable biological markers that a woman observes in her cycle. It is standardize and highly reliable. It is far more successful than IVF or other artificial reproductive technologies.

So if you know of women, or if you are suffering from gynecological problems such as infertility, recurrent miscarriages, do yourself a favor and check out NaProTECHNOLOGY.

We can't leave this up to the traditional obstetrics/gynecology professionals. It's up to women to advance women's health. Let's do it.

Practical Tips for Teaching Chastity to Our Sons

2009-01-14T08:43:00.001-07:00

Father Michael Sliney's interview on Catholic net provides successful tips on how to relate successfully with our sons. I would use Fr. Sliney's suggestions, while also keeping to the basic principles: find opportunities to link babies & bonding (dating & parenting), pray, and seek opportunities to live out SPICE (spiritual, physical, intellectual, communication/creative, emotional).

Practical Tips for Teaching Chastity

2009-01-12T15:33:00.000-07:00

Chastity is hard work, but rewarding. Self-mastery of the passion is training in human freedom. Here are some simple chastity tips to help connect you with your daughter:

Look for opportunities to connect love-making with life-making: keep “babies and bonding” together when discussing dating and courtship with your daughter. For example, your daughter may discuss that her friend is going steady. You might say, “Your friend’s boyfriend is handsome and smart.” Pause. Then say something like, “I wonder what he’ll be like when he becomes a father someday. The way he plays soccer and cheers on his teammates makes me think he’ll make a great soccer coach for his children when he becomes a father.”

By bringing “future parenting” into the discussion, you may startle your daughter, but it helps to frame the discussion of courtship by connecting love-making with parenting. It is a reminder to your daughter that the natural result of sex leads to babies, regardless of the widespread use of contraceptives. Also it helps your daughter to reflect on the qualities she desires in her future husband who will be the father of her children.

Pray daily for your daughter’s future spouse, and encourage your daughter to pray for her future husband, that he will remain chaste and grow to be the person God calls him to be.

Show your daughter how to put chastity “spice” into her life!

It may seem “spicy” to live a life portrayed in movies and TV sitcoms that show unmarried couples in bed scenes. If we imitate loose morals of Hollywood, however, we will end up getting hurt and the people around us will get hurt, too.

What we need is the “SPICE of Life.” Each of us has a Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Creative and Emotional dimensions of our personhood. It is called the “SPICE of Life” because these qualities makes life so incredibly rich. SPICE helps us to grow more fully as the person God created us to be. Here’s how you can share some SPICE with your daughter:

Spirituality. After watching a movie, discuss the differences between your family values and the values promoted in the film. For example, “Those two actors really were attracted to another. I wonder if they live their lives where God is in the center of the lives. What do you think?” Also, “Do you think the characters shared similar values and faith in God?” These questions may lead to thoughtful reflections about what is a God-centered life, and what are our values and beliefs. With some reflection, we may come to the realization that when couples rush into relationships they may not have given themselves time—or experiences-- to learn whether they share the same values and faith.

Physical. After watching a movie, you may say, “Did you see how the two actors let themselves be dominated by their passions? They started to kiss, and then they lost their ability to remain chaste. They did what they felt like doing, even though they were not married. “ By having this discussion with your daughter, you are affirming the institution of marriage. You can explain that it is only in an exclusive, life-long relationship that the sexual act is proper and good for the woman and man and for the children they may conceive. This is marriage. Affirming marriage will demonstrate that you have high expectations for your daughter because she is worth waiting for. Brainstorm with your daughter how the characters in the movie may have practiced chastity.

Intellectual. Look for opportunities to praise your daughter for good decision-making and for demonstrating respect and love for herself and other persons. For example, “It is wonderful that you and your boyfriend are involved in many group activities with friends.” “I like how you both are volunteering and doing service for others.” “By committing to living chastely, you both are giving each other an opportunity to grow into mature and loving persons.”

Creative/Communicative. Live a chaste life to the fullest! Living a chaste life blossoms in friendship, and family life is the best place to practice friendship. During the daily life of work and play, look for opportunities to share joy, humor, and laughter, as well as to offer comfort to one another during times of tears, sorrows and sufferings.

Emotional. We pray that our daughters avoid relationships that lead to negative emotions: jealousy, envy, possessiveness, uncontrolled anger, etc. During the teenage years there will be plenty of opportunities for discussing the negative emotions caused by poor relationships. These are teaching moments for a mother to discuss with her daughter about how to avoid relationships that belittle and hurt her dignity as a person created in the image and likeness of God. You may help your daughter develop steps to effectively influence relationships that positively promote and affirm the dignity of the person.

Los Alamos FertilityCare announces new website

2009-01-12T15:25:00.000-07:00

Are you interested in a family planning method that's natural and completely healthy? Find out more about Los Alamos FertilityCare at our new website!